Letters from Norman
So glad you continue leaning a bit on this shoulder (really His in a human form!), and I enjoy being loved and love–at a distance!
I’m just home from our great six weeks in Britain, living links every day–a whitened harvest, as Jesus said, of folks “blessedly” made desperate by their negatives and thus conditioned for their eternal replacement, and then the continuance of negatives in this life are adventurously seen as the jumping off pads for HIM the light swallowing up the dark. And then, love, you can help so many others!
But still I must “chase” you on your saying you see it intellectually, but question whether you believe it. Dear, your problem is still assessing your attitudes by your self-responses. But believing is merely taking GOD at HIS word, with no concern about what you feel about it. Yes, you DO believe, but then you bring in self-questioning as to whether you do believe. But that out! Go on affirming and “confessing” that you DO believe and ARE believing, if all hell appears to say you are not. While you keep “obeying” by “believing,” and thus your inner eyes are on God and His word, then the Spirit will inwardly confirm in His time, as He sees you loosened up from self-assessment. But you are getting and seeing the negatives in their correct place, dear, and that is great riches which so few see–and thus stew! And you can in due course bring relief to many.
So loving you, dear,
Glad you keep pouring out. You really do know the answer within yourself–Christ dwelling there for keeps–but you still confuse your rightful human soul-feelings, your outer human “flesh” clothing–with your TRUE SPIRIT SELF, joined to His Spirit. I know I have sent you that leaflet on soul-spirit.
A good negative is necessary for a good positive to have it to “swallow” up, like light is only seen when there is dark and we turn on the light to swallow up the dark. So you “foolishly” keep on blaming yourself for having had these angry hate feelings about God, and will not recognise that God likes that. It proves that you are not just a clod of clay but a precious living person who must find out the truth before you accept it–thus you end your letter by saying “the other part of me feels an urgent anxiety about the matter.” Precisely. The urge of your true spirit-self for ultimate reality in place of surges of feelings, angry thoughts, etc You have had to have the soul disturbances (your darkness) for the light to be able to shew itself–the eternal fact of Christ in your inner spirit-self.
So I can’t say more, love, than constantly repeat this. You end by asking “Does release come by saying, I am free (Christ in me)?” Yes, love, it does, as you persistently say that with at least all the believing you can, that God’s word (such as Gal. 2:20) IS eternal truth to you. As you keep saying it, and confessing it to others, the Spirit will confirm to you. You will go on having soul-reactions but you will recognize that as something to “count all joy” (James 1:2) because they give you continual practice in affirming who you really ARE.
So just this, dear. I’m off again this week for two weeks family conferences in Blowing Rock, NC, wish you could join us. Then home through August, then off West Coast through September to early November. Wish we were coming you way but can’t do it.
Loving you and write again,