A Confession
by Steven Prewitt

This “Confession” correspondence is an email I sent to a college friend of mine.I haven’t spoken to him in 12 years…until recently. I was prompted by the Holy Spirit to contact him after seeing some college-aged young adults I know make similar sin choices to the ones I made when I was their age. I am blessed to have the opportunity to confess, repent and make restitution for my sins. My friend is now an attorney for the university we went to,and he teaches in the business school there as well. Following is my friend’s reply as well as a short letter I wrote to one of the young adults I was concerned about.

April 17,2002

Dear Lee,

Over the years I have had periods of deep remorse and sadness over my choices,actions,and way of life while I was in college. I feel sadness today as deep and real as ever. I am deeply sorry, Lee, for my sin-filled life choices while we were together at college.I weep and regret the influence my satanic way of living had on you. It was wrong, I knew it was wrong, and I did it anyway. I am sorry. I repent and I humbly ask your forgiveness.

I started drinking when I was 16; spring break my junior year in high school. I was hiding, deceiving my parents, and leaving my Christian friends from my church. I knowingly went against the Christian values I knew to be right.It was sin. I am sorry. Instead of facing all those high school hurdles (both hard and easy, difficult and fun) like a Godly young adult, I padded the brunt of them with alcohol. Instead of enduring and enjoying most social activities my senior year in high school, I headed to the college fraternity parties. In the parable of the sower and the seeds, mine was the seed choked by the thorns of sin and deceit.

Fast forward to my sophomore year off at college.When I met your sister,Suzan,I knew she was someone any Godly man would dream to have as a mate. I knew I offered zero in return. Not only zero; I was living a Satan-filled Satan-chosen life. I now see how you and Suzan were examples of ultimate integrity… and I had none! I should have been the same for you. I could have been the same for you.I could have (at any moment) chosen to stop sinning. Repent. Ask Forgiveness. Then live as Christ intended I live, spontaneously giving His Love through me to other people. I did not and I am sorry. I am also sincerely sorry my sin-life affected Suzan in any way. I deeply regret, Lee, that as great as a friendship you and I shared,how much more it could have been if I had not been in sin. I hate that I took Christ living in me through every drunken moment of it.

I thank you, Lee, for your Christian witness of integrity, hope, fun, humor and love.Your example will always be with me and I am grateful.When I think back almost 20 years, I am deeply saddened and weep when I think of Mary Lacey. She and I dated off and on my last several months at school. I knew her as someone that needed help and direction. More than that she needed Christ’s hope, love and salvation! I did not offer Him. I could not share Him with her because I had left Him back at high school somewhere. I weep as I imagine seeing her sister,Beth. I weep to think of embracing Beth and saying that I am sorry your sister died and I did nothing to show her Christ’s Love or tell her about Christ and His eternal Saving Grace. I want to be able to ask Beth for forgiveness even though there is nothing I can do now to help Mary find Christ.She died a couple of years after I last saw her so I do not know that she died lost or saved…that is not my point.I know I did nothing for her and it hurts me greatly.

Lee,my staff at Back Yard Burgers is mostly high school and college-aged people. I strive daily to show them care and love. I know it is Christ’s love through me. I want the best for them.The best choices.The best opportunities.With humility, I now see that mine can be the seed sown in the fertile soil and I can reap a harvest for Christ. I pray daily for a chance to openly share Christ’s hope, love, salvation, and grace that is available as He is always knocking at the door of their hearts if only they will repent, open, and let Him in. Again, I weep as I know some of them have Christ in their hearts already, yet choose similar sin choices as the ones I made 20 years ago. I am deeply saddened for those who will have the same regrets about their young adult years as I do for mine. Unfortunately, some of them also are missing opportunities to live examples of Christ’s Love to the people around them and it saddens me greatly to see them do what I did.

Thank you for listening. I thank God for you that I could always count on you, brother!

Love Always. Steven 

The story of the sower and the seed is in Luke Chapter 8 verses 4-15. Here I am. I am always available! Steven and Janie Prewitt 514 Goshen Drive

Boone NC 28607 828-264-9057 spprew@aol.com

Lee’s Reply

April 17,2002

Steven,

Thank you for your thoughtful and encouraging letter. I am not sure that you needed to ask my forgiveness. I do not recall that you had sinned against me. But to the extent that you did, I gladly extend the grace to you that God has extended to me, and I rejoice to call you not just my friend, but my brother.

Even if asking my forgiveness was not necessary, repenting of sin and asking God’s forgiveness is certainly what God commands us to do, and confessing your sins to a brother in Christ is both consistent with that command and the fruit of true repentance, as is godly sorrow for sin. And in that regard your letter is both encouraging and convicting. I do not sorrow over my sin as I ought. I am not always sure that I understand what biblical repentance is. And I do not confess my sins to other believers as I ought.So thanks for your letter,and I pray that God would use it in sanctifying me.

And while your remorse over you sin is plain, I encourage you that the love of Christ and His death is sufficient to cover all of your past and future sin! I t is only by knowing the depths of our sin that we can fathom the richness of Christ’s love and the meaning of forgiveness! So I hope that your remorse and mourning over your sin has borne the fruit of that peace that passes understanding.

I look forward to corresponding more!

Lee T.

This letter was directed to a young adult friend who had made similar sin choices to the ones I had made when I was her age. My deep concern made me think back to when I was her age (almost 20 years) and the sin choices I had made then.

Dear Dorothy,

Remember what Jesus says in Mathew 7: ”Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it.” Also find the Matthew Henry Commentary regarding this passage. Matthew Henry is the most-used Christian commentary in helping people understand what they read in the Bible.

I want to encourage you to continue to follow the strait path! I pray for you constantly. I know from my own experience that Satan is very upset with your decision to follow the Godly path. He will try to do everything to tempt you and deceive you and discourage you. (Be encouraged!) Satan will constantly want you to think you are missing out on fun, excitement, friends, and an easy life in general by not going the way of the world like the majority of people who take the wide road to destruction. (Remember Luke 8. The seed the sower sowed that was choked by sin and deceit.)

Understand also that Satan will try to trick you into thinking a “neutral path” is ok. Understand there is no middle or neutral path! You are either walking in God’s will, or you are walking in sin!

Matthew Henry clearly states there is no neutral path.He says “in the one or the other of these all are walking: there is not middle place hereafter, no middle way now. All the children of men are saints or sinners, Godly or ungodly.” Satan wants you to see the Godly path as hard, not fun, and lonely. I encourage you to encourage yourself and others close to you to remain steadfast in your decision to go God’s way even when it does seem hard and lonely.By God’s grace, the more you do the right thing and live in God’s will, the more you will know Godly comfort,Godly confidence,Godly satisfaction and Godly life!

I encourage you and pray that you will lean on each other for encouragement and accountability. Plan ahead so that sin-filled parties don’t appear to be the only option for a good time…. stay busy living a Godly life and the temptation will be less. Also, learn that a good time is when you do the right thing!

HONESTY will be your key to success here. If you are discouraged, say it! If you are lonely, call out for appropriate companionship! If Satan tempts you, expose him! If you sin, CONFESS IT! In confession is healing and in healing is God’s Grace. Please! Please! Please! Do not let Satan rob you of Jesus’ Grace! Don’t let sin be a barrier to those you love. That sick pit in your stomach caused by sin is not worth it!

Lastly, I am very grateful that I was prompted by the Holy Spirit to confess and heal my relationship with my friend Lee T. Ours was a broken relationship of almost 20 years. Because of my painful concerns for you and your sin choices, I was able to break through my sin barrier and know God’s forgiveness through Lee. WHAT A BLESSING! Though I hate the sin path you and I both chose, the positive result for me is my new relationship—in Christ—with Lee. Thank God for His Grace!

Thanks, again, for the opportunity to express my (Christ’s through me) love, concern and encouragement. I am blessed to have the opportunity to spread seeds that will reap a harvest for Christ!

ALL THE BEST!

Steven