A Pastor Writes Page Prewitt
by Page Prewitt

Dear Page,
Does it seem strange to be hearing from me after all this time? I am sure you are wondering. However, there is a good cause. I have been here 33 years now and the pressures have been exhausting. The size of the church, the size of the staff, the usual crises in people’s lives that require compassion and energy, my own needs and family life, plus my drive to succeed, and also my concern to be super-responsible, all add up to a miserable existence at times and it is all frequently exhausting.

Now you know I know what we know. Besides myself and my wife, who encourages me sometimes to "be who I am," there is little fellowship in the deeper things of our faith. As a result there is often frustration in the working out of this glorious truth. I noticed in your report from Britain [see Sept/Oct 1986] that many there were having the same problem. It was your response in The Intercessor that prompted this note. I forget–lose sight of–believe the big lie–or get out of perspective the truth of Christ/I. It helps me to have someone say it to me for a change. Thank-you.

I have come to realize that Christian perfection is not the same as human perfection. That is something to get fixed in your soul. And I have to keep before me the words of a song by Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young, called "Suite: Judy Blue Eyes." They said, "don’t let the past remind you of what you are not now." In other words, do not let the past Satan/spirit union remind you of itself while you are now in this new Christ/I union. The past will always try to remind you of what you are not now as a new creature.

I appreciate The Intercessor so very much. Grace, peace, and love to you and all the saints and the precious forms of Christ.

Much love,
Henry

Answer from Page:

Dearest Henry,
I wouldn’t take anything for hearing from you–joy upon joy!! Thank you so much for taking the time to write.

It does get hard, doesn’t it? (Life, that is!)

All of it is the Father’s love coming in the form of pressure to make us have to live from more than a "just me" consciousness. These pressures, of course, have pushed some of us to the seeing of ourselves as "Christ/I," and we have begun to live by faith in the fact that this is who we really are. This "Christ as me seeing" and knowing has given us great release and a true experiencing of Romans 8.

The thing that has been the new flash of light and LIFE to us in the last couple of years has been the truth about the self not being independent and what that lie really is and does. Of course, we know that we never have been independent–it’s either "Christ/I" (Christian) or "Satan/I"
(non-Christian). The Satan/I lie that we were ever independent was Satan’s lie from his fall and is in fact the "original sin"–"I am independent, I am equal with God, I am God to myself." These, his lies, have infected man from Adam’s fall. If all independence is really Satan’s lie, then all independent believing is really still his lie and therefore his stuff.

The one capacity that we have is our inherent freedom. This freedom is the same freedom that is in God, and it is the source God being forever "other-love." With that capacity I either receive or reject the truth. As I live, believing it is He as me, then that is "faith living" and that "faithing" of the truth gives Him the reins of my humanity–body, soul, and spirit. This means that the manifested life of me is Him. On the other hand, if I begin to, without realizing it, see myself as an "alone/I," "just me," then Satan’s lie has caught me. It is from this crack of unbelief that he enters, "stage right," and begins to do his stuff, using my members (soul and body–sin in his members, Paul says).

The Bible says that "everything that is not of faith is sin." Faith in what? God, and the fact that He lives my life and it is not just me. Unbelief is the sin that I commit. (Everything that is not of faith is sin.) The manifestation that follows, as a result of my wrong believing, is really Satan. The deeds can appear to be good or bad. Much of the upset and turmoil that we experience is really Satan getting into the picture and causing all sorts of upset. We are unaware that this is what is happening because the independent believing is VERY subtle and we don’t see that we are doing it.

For example, we say "I’m just the kind of person that is always in a hurry," or "I’m always grumpy in the mornings," etc. The truth is God is how He wants to be in us. We are not just us being just us anytime. It is in truth and in fact Satan, when we are believing "just me." Sin of this type is not imputed because it is not deliberate on our part, but it has its consequences nonetheless. The way out of this lie is very simple–I simply recognize what I am doing and then pop back to faith, stating that I am, in fact, Christ/I. This recognition is the confession (agreeing with God). Like this: "Look what I’ve been believing. I know better than that!" No chastisement or false guilt. The Bible says that confession heals sin. It is the putting THE LIGHT on Satan, thus causing him to flee. Now we are free again, walking in the light of the truth of our "Christ/I-ness." Now the manifested life is once again totally Him. Harmony within ourselves is again experienced, and the burden is once again light. (The burden getting heavy is a clue that something might be wrong.)

Thanks again for writing. Let me hear from you again very soon.
Much love,
Page